Underrated topic: The Difficulty of Trusting Your Truth

Sun 2nd, February 2025

Ciao, Happy Sunday!

Controversial and hard times are here.

Going along with what everyone expects seems easier at first.You avoid arguments, people see you as cooperative. This is the path of least resistance, minimizing external constraints – the social pressures, potential conflicts, and judgments that come from disagreeing. But I've learned that this short-term peace creates a different kind of problem.You start building up internal constraints – self-doubt, suppressed beliefs, a growing sense of inauthenticity.

The really tough thing is learning to say no to what everyone else thinks is right, and actually believing in yourself when you disagree with the group. This is where the internal and external pressures collide. You have the external constraint of potential social disapproval if you speak up, compounded by the internal constraint of your own self-doubt – am I right?

It's hard to trust your own judgment when it's different from everyone else's. And the worst part? Figuring out when you're actually right, and when you're just being stubborn. If everyone's going one way and you're going another, how do you know you're not the one who's wrong? 

I don't have the answer yet, but I've found some helpful strategies.Changing the group of people you're around can be really valuable. You learn from others, compare different social norms and viewpoints. This is easier if you have the opportunity to travel, or even just enough free time outside of work to broaden your social circle.Self-reflection is crucial, too. I've personally found these reflection cards really helpful: Emotional First Aid Kit. And, sometimes, the best approach isn't to fight to make your point, but simply to leave and find a new environment. You have to break free from what seemed normal and find something new.

Lastly, part of this process is understanding that it's okay to evolve, to change your mind or to be simply wrong. Forgive yourself.

Of course, being able to do all of this is a privilege.

Books reference of this article

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